Drowning in dysfunction

I was raised in dysfunction and I married dysfunction. It’s the only behaviour I know. As destructive as it is, I’m comfortable around it because I know my role as a codependent. Despite craving peace, I am constantly drawn to chaotic, dysfunctional relationships.

And I haven’t a clue how to change this pattern. Other than what seems obvious to me – avoid all interaction with other human beings. I know its not a reasonable solution. But for now I don’t have a clue. I just have this song, Going Under by Evanescence, to reflect how out of my depth I feel in a relationship of any kind.

 

 

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11 comments

  1. Independence can be a scary thing, but I think you’d be surprised at how comfortable it can be, too. And so empowering.

    Instead of being dependent on others, learn to be dependent on yourself. If you don’t need anyone else, then the people you allow into your life will be there because they’re worth your time. That doesn’t mean you won’t run into assholes or people who will fool you, but try to look at each encounter as a learning experience.

    Avoidance can work, but not for very long… Just don’t let anyone take advantage of you. Good luck. πŸ™‚

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thanks my friend. I like the way you’ve explained that – its what I’m trying to do – figure out ME and what ME wants and then choose the people that are agreeable for ME. I like to refer to meeting new people as “social experiments”. And, seriously, the best thing about being on my own is…. I don’t have to hold in my farts =D

      Liked by 1 person

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