The mood changes of bipolar coupled with the side effects of medication, I often find myself wondering “who am I really?” Olanxapine made me bright and bubbly, socially acceptable. And people LOOOOOVED me. But because of severe side effects I had to stop taking it. Now its just Lithium, dissociation and conditioning, and no one lives here anymore. I am blank nothingness, silent, withdrawn. Different. Gone from one extreme to the other. So who IS the real me, the me I’m supposed to be? I actually have no clue. How do I ‘unbecome’ when I don’t think I’ve ever actually BEEN anything before…..?