Bikers, bullshitters and death by drowning

So I’ve only cheated on my diet twice in my first week. I call that a success. Watch out dating site…. I’m nearly ready….. just no assholes this time round please. No prospect bikers with patches who fall off their motorbikes, no married men in a mid-life crisis, no bullshitters, sorry, I mean salesmen, no salesmen please, no greek gigolo’s, no young playa’s, no steroid-pumping weight trainers and please no sweet-natured Afrikaans speaking farmers. Ek praat nie die taal nie. (I don’t speak the language)

Aw, big, bad biker, you

Aw, big, bad biker, you

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Now as per a request by a fellow blogger for more upbeat posts with less doom and gloom, here is my effort:
If I did decide to kill myself I would happily do it by drowning. I always have been a water baby, or should I say, babe, so it seems appropriate. A diver once told me that was the most peaceful and upbeat way to die. Not gloomy at all. Since I’ve been wanting to go diving without a scub tank, I did the responsible thing and rang my Dr S. My shrinky-dink. We cheerily chatted about my little predicament, agreed I had some optomistic options and then together we laughed and laughed and laughed about the medical aid coverage. The outcome is hopeful. Despite this being the second critical depression in a one year period, things look rosy because I have a positive attitude. And there’s always the chance I’ll snap out of it because my medication dosage is high. So I’m pumped. I’m amped. Next week I could get to have a sedated slumber party in the psych ward of the local hospital. I’m so excited, I am just tickled to death.

Advertisements

11 comments

    1. Aw, thanks Marie. I’ve missed you too. No, no, I’m not looking for a cool guy, I’m looking for a HOT guy πŸ˜‰ Just kidding. A kind heart is what I want. And yes!! I’ll do everything I can before going into hospital. Take care Marie. Hugs

      Liked by 1 person

  1. Had to giggle at the dating bit SO TRUE. In my area I find all the men 35-55 are trying to relive their youth. They want a Barbie-Doll ( mostly they do not deserve and never will) to ride on the motorcycle they store in their living room.

    They want a gym partner, bungee jumper, marathon running, all around ADVENTURE GAL hahaha! Fuck that lol

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh yes!! It’s fine for them to sit there with their belly hanging over their belt. But when its MY belly hanging over my belt its a different fucking story. Hahaha. Oh no, all those bicycle riders, cross trainers, cliff hanging, hand gliding freaks! Why am I gonna ride a bicycle when I have a car? For goodness sake. And I live by the beach so that perpetuates the whole body conscious thing. But I’ll find my fellow poet……

      Like

    1. I know! What a grand time. I’m hoping others don’t catch on to the fun times. They’ll just commercialize the whole experience and ruin it for the organically depressed like us. A bit manic today. So in keeping with the upbeat flavor *skips outside for cigarette*

      Liked by 1 person

  2. You are crazy,oops, funny. If you can find a positive side to suicide and laugh with your therapist, you might be ok w/o scuba gear. I don’t know if you’ve read much on ECT, it’s not like the movie promise. When I’m at my worst or cycling out of control ECT hits the reset button. Keep the option on your growing positive list.
    Take care. I’m hear if you need to talk.
    M

    Liked by 1 person

Say what you mean, and mean what you say

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s