The days are too long and yet there are never enough hours in a day to get everything done. I can’t work fast enough, but the work is coming in faster. I can’t sleep at bedtime but I wake up sleepy. I’m smoking more, and coughing less. I’m eating less, and gaining weight. I’m sad when I should be happy. I cry when I should be laughing. The more I try to remember, the more I forget. The more I try to forget, the clearer the memory. The greater the trust, the more the betrayal. Today is winter with summer temperatures. They say tomorrow will be cold. I put my phone on silent so I don’t have to wait for it to ring. I stay at work at hometime because I don’t want to go home. I leave home early for work because I don’t want to be late. I am lonely, yet I continue to isolate myself.
I still stare vacantly into space. And I sigh, deeply, incessantly throughout the day. I’m getting depressed.