Routine is the answer

I’m told bipolar responds well to routine. Go to bed the same time every night. Wake up the same time every morning. Structuring the day with tasks, and repeating the same or a similar structure everyday, and voila! You have routine, and bipolar is happy.

I’m fortunate because my job has structure and routine. I do the same, but slightly different, thing every day. All within the time constraints of deadlines. This makes for a happy bipolar worker.

Evenings, I have a routine of shower, cook dinner (finally I’m cooking and not just eating cereal), eat, watch tv/internet/read. Then off to bed makes for a happy bipolar girl.

Weekends are a challenge. You see, I am of the firm belief that weekends were made for sleeping. I’m a happy and content recluse so I don’t WANT to go out. I don’t want to go and walk on the beach, or have a coffee, or go shopping, or go watch a movie. I love nothing more than wearing pajamas Friday night to Monday morning and sleeping for about 50 hours.

Sounds like bliss. Yes, sign me up please….. But lately I’ve become aware of a pattern. Mondays are my most difficult days to get through. Okay, obviously, because they’re Mondays. By the natural order of the universe, they just are the shittiest day of the week. But what I feel is more than a disgruntlement with the first day of the week. I’m seriously depressed. As in I want to go home, I’m weepy, my mind traverses the halls of suicide options and I fail to see the hope in anything. The day is endless and I get through it by telling myself I can dive into bed the moment I get home.

It would appear that I need routine in my weekends. Not the routine that says, ok, I’ll sleep from 11am ’til 4pm, have dinner and jump back into bed at 8pm. I need to get up. Go out. Take that walk on the bloody beach. Drink that silly cup of coffee. Browse around the shops. But I draw the line at movies (no cigarette break).

I know it will help to alleviate that Monday Depression. The logical, responsible part of me knows I will only benefit from routine on the weekends. The stubborn part of me says…… well, you don’t really want to know…. totally inappropriate language!

So I’m not making any promises. But if I do venture from my lair this weekend, I will snap a few photographs. As proof. And then I’ll let you know how Monday went.

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12 comments

  1. AHH!!! This is me!!! I have been really struggling with this three-day weekend. In the US we get the first monday off – “Labor Day” – and I’ve done nothing but stay at home, eat cereal – ONCE A DAY – I am living on so little food, but I have plenty and it’s going to go to waste.

    I am paralyzed on the weekends.

    Next weekend I will try to do the same. Go for coffee. People Watch. Farmer’s Market. Get some weird veggie and learn how to cook it. (Kayak??)

    Thanks for this post!! Argh!! I’m not the only one!!!! LOLOLOL It’s not after 1pm here and I still have yet to eat… BUT I did finally bathe after 3 days of no bathing. One can only take so much. I am however living in a robe. Perhaps I need to put some real clothes on. hahaha ๐Ÿ™‚

    Much love and laughter about this!
    ~M~

    Liked by 1 person

  2. *Correction: It’s already after 1pm Eastern Time here on the East Coast and I have not had a meal (last meal was cereal yesterday at 12:30pm) … how am I alive??

    Like

  3. Reblogged this on Paddling for PEACE. and commented:
    Head up Bipolar Beauties… is this you? Can we support each other on the weekends so we’re not like… I don’t know ruining our routine that’s so vital to our survival? Loved this piece. So true!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. OMG this is me too!!! I usually make no plans for the weekend and I end up feeling completely lost. I feel like I want the weekend “off” but then I just stay in my pajamas and watch murder porn on the tv all day and I feel like shit. I wonder why???

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes! Exactly! I take the weekend off to catch up on sleep. I thought I was the only one whose weekends end up with feeling awful. AND you’re a pajama-lover too ๐Ÿ˜€ Thanks for the feedback, its extremely reassuring

      Like

  5. Ditto. Sleep is amazing. I agree that structure helps but it’s tough to implement when all you want to do is sleep all day. Probably doesn’t help when we are manic and up for an eternity. We probably make up for it when we sleep the day away. Great point. – The Night Owl

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh, I do love my sleep. I usually use weekends to catch-up on my sleep. I’m drained after a full work week and if I don’t catch-up, I’ll slip into hypomania or depression. But I also know I use it as an excuse to avoid socializing, reinforcing my reclusive ways, which is not healthy. Soooooo, the ‘Shakespearean’ dilemma, to sleep, or not to sleep, that is the question………ZzzzZzzzzzzzZzzz

      Like

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